Life as an Entropy....

I shared some time long ago reading this book "Self Matters". Well the truth is I haven't touched the book in months. I got stuck at the part where I had to go back in time and remember insignificant moments. We as human cherish or regret our relationships the way they occur to us. Our relationships tell us what we are good at and what aspects of our nature we need to work upon more. They teach us how to love, trust and give. Relationships come in different sizes and shapes. Some are just a two day interaction we share on a train journey while there are others who would be stuck on for life. These are all opportunities God gives us to learn about ourselves, about people and about life. We have all had that moment in our life that make us cringe and those that we would rather wish to forget altogether but in essence we would be ignoring our entire self. I think its essential to look into these experiences. There is no looking back, everything accumulates inside us. We are our past, we are everything that has happened to us. We are every moment of joy and every wound.Sometimes when I think of the past I realise I am stuck though I know there is nothing to be afraid of now. So I decide that it could be the 23 years of memories to shift through. Looking at that task was exhausting so I dropped it. Thankfully God didn't drop me. Through a series of unrelated events that had depressed me, God was able to peel back the layers of denial and self preservation to expose the inner truth. Well to say so, there might be instances in every ones life that we do not want to look at or something we don't want to talk about. For me I feel I am encircling around such things,examining it and rationalizing it but never feeling it. Parts of my dilemma were questions I didn't know how to answer and how to hold someone responsible for hurting you. I have been emotionally detached for a long time not wanting to blame anybody for anything. There are things that we all go through and there are things that we might be in the middle of dealing with right now. I believe God has great things in store for us. But what we need to do is to go back to the source of our pain and be honest with ourselves and allow ourselves to feel the pain and learn what we all call... LIFE.. :)